Angelina Jolie Seems To Be Enjoying Her Bravery Boobs ™

08
Oct
2013

angelina jolie breast implantsAngelina Jolie certainly seems to be enjoying her Bravery Boobs ™, right? Since Angelina underwent an elective double mastectomy and had breast implants installed earlier this year, she can’t seem to help but go braless in clingy ultra-thin tank tops that far from hide the perpetual nipple hard-on that she is experiencing after getting a boob job in May.

Like hundreds of thousands of mothers that are uncomfortable with the result of what pregnancy and age has done to their bodies, 38-year old Angelina got breast implants. But unlike these common folk, who don’t employ a team of publicists to make sure that the general public adores you and buys your products, Angelina Jolie decided to spin her story of breast implants into a fairytale of bravery and profit.

While the BRCA genetic testing, and Angelina Jolie’s decision to have a double mastectomy plus breast implants, are both hotly debated subjects, we still don’t buy Angelina’s story. The fact that she wrote an article promoting the expensive BRCA tests as well as the business that performed the testing, mastectomy and breast augmentation, makes me think that she was compensated by the Pink Lotus Breast Center. Oh, and the fact that she is now perpetually braless and seems to be rather proud of her newly enhanced bust seems to reveal the real reason she got a boob job…

Introducing Angelina Jolie, The Braless Wonder*:

*Bravery Boobs ™ sold separately.


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8 Comments

  • avatar for fucks sake says:

    This is one of the worst things i’ve read in my life.

    Is she not allowed to enjoy having breasts? Can she not feel like a woman?

    I can put into words how fucking angry this makes me.

  • avatar Jennifer says:

    So many people bashed commenters for saying she just wanted get get a boob job and used the testing as a reason to get one. I completely think she did just want bigger titis and wanted to look all grand for doing a stupid test! If she was really concerned about breast cancer she wouldn’t have gotten them stuff with cancer causing silicone! She’s Fake FakeFake!!!!

  • avatar taffy says:

    If she wanted to get breast implants because she wasn’t happy with her body, that’s what she should have said instead of using cancer as an excuse. She’s such a fake person.

  • avatar Scott says:

    Fake boobs are disgusting. The women who get them like to claim “I just want to fit into my shirts better,” but they’re just vain sluts.

  • avatar Pam says:

    The author of this article, Betty Bang, cannot be serious. I am a registered nurse and I can tell you that the difference between a “Boob Job” or breast augmentation and a RADICAL MASTECTOMY is huge! In an augmentation procedure, an implant is placed into breast, while leaving existing tissue (either above or below muscle). With a radical mastectomy the tissue is removed and the implant is added. A mastectomy has a longer recovery time and more pain. I am stupefied at your lack of compassion, especially if you are a woman as you claim. You are a jackass!

  • Uneducated, narrow minded, judgemental men and women who either don’t have the courage, self esteem or money to not only admit but accept their discomfort/discontent with their own bodies should really just keep their opinions to themselves. Most of those SAD individuals dont have the courage to actually follow through with and do something about their discontent with themselves. Instead, they end up settling with the idea that they are STUCK WITH their unhappinesses and lower their standards for not only themselves, but their lives as a whole. See the difference between strong willed, high self esteem individuals such as Angelina Jolie (or myself) and people like all of you who bash her is this;
    “Instead of HIDING her insecurities and fears (whether they be medical or personal) we own up to them. Accept them. Face them not as an unchangeable obstacle of life but as an obstacle to be tackled and triumphed. We don’t sit and judge others for their decisions that we don’t understand ‘for instance; if you’re unhappy with yourself in anyway and COULD do something about it, WHY THE HELL WOULDN’T YOU?’ I truly don’t understand that way of thinking.
    So though you say we are vapid or shallow or call us liars; having fake boobs does not make us fake people, or any less of a good person. It makes us the most honest of all. Because, not only do we have to admit to others our ‘personal issues’ but we have to admit them openly to ourselves. Most of you can’t even do that HONESTLY. And most of you don’t have the guts to take control of your own lives and your own happiness and DO SOMETHING ABOUT. Grow some lady balls people and wake the fuck up. You aren’t better than Angelina Jolie because you don’t make millions of dollars and dont have billions of people look up to you and admire you.

  • avatar hmmm says:

    The commenter above somewhere along the line took something extremely personally… for what reason, I don’t know??? No one said having breast implants makes you a bad person or anything of the sort! Or that a woman isn’t allowed to enjoy her breasts, real or fake. The article just speculated on something that seems almost obvious to me… did Angelina use possible future cancer as a cover up story to just get some new tittays installed? Honestly, I didn’t buy her story for one minute. I don’t think there is anything wrong with getting breast implants, and so many women do these days, so who cares??! It’s just that it didn’t seem to make any sense. She didn’t HAVE cancer, she was just apparently more likely to have breast and uterine cancer according to a genetic test. So she opted to have a double-mastectomy to avoid complications, and opted for (what looks like) silicone implants??? Implants come with so much more risk than possibly having cancer one day. I’m just saying… it didn’t make much sense to me. And if she’s so worried about cancer, why didn’t she have a hysterectomy too? Seems like an obvious cover up story, and I’m sure she didn’t mean for it to be as big of a deal as it became, but the media blew it up.


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