We’ve heard of lawyers being called blood sucking vampires before, but this is the first time we’ve seen a lawyer literally transform themselves into one! Meet former lawyer Maria Jose Cristerna, who has physically transformed herself into a vampire:
The 36-year old decided to make a drastic life change when she left her law career behind to became a tattoo artist. And while you would think that that is when her vampire-inspired transformation began, she says that she feels her transformation began at age 12 when she got her first piercing. At age 12, Maria had her ears pierced with large gauge jewelry and started stretching her earlobes. At 14, Maria convinced her father to take her to get a tattoo and she got the first of many tattoos: a large black star on her shoulder. Twenty years later, Maria has nearly 50 piercings and her body is 95% covered in tattoos…and that is the tamest part of her transformation! In addition to the body art and piercings, she also has subdermal implants in her forehead (to give the appearance of horns), as well as in her chest and forearms. And who could call themselves a vampire without a vicious pair of fangs? Unlike less committed wannabe vampires, Maria’s fangs are permanent and are the result of cosmetic dentistry and implants.
Maria lives in Guadalajara, Mexico and has been called the most modified woman in the world. Perhaps more surprising than her physical transformation into a vampire is that Maria Jose Cristerna is a devoted mother to 4 children and, outside of her unusual appearance, she lives a rather normal life, running her tattoo shop and helping her kids with their homework.
More pictures of Maria Jose Cristerna:
Nicki Minaj is the cover model for the April 2013 “Elle” Magazine, where they claim to have given her a makeunder. The rapper is known for her over-the-top costumes, makeup and colorful wigs and she was photographed for the magazine looking less like a clown. But is that really a “makeunder”? In the Elle photos Nicki is wearing just as much makeup as usual, colored contacts and a long blonde weave.
So for Nicki’s “dramatic” Elle makeunder, they covered her in makeup in a more neutral tone. Hmm. That’s pretty unexciting, right? Well don’t tell that to Nicki, because she feels like this photoshoot was a real accomplishment. No, really. I’m not even kidding. According to Nicki:
“To go in front of the camera, without pink lips or big ol’ crazy lashes…you know, nothing…I felt naked. It was scary! So this photo shoot was a real accomplishment in my eyes!”
If someone is going to claim that they are going to give Nicki Minaj a makeunder, I envision it to be more like Cherry from “I’m Gonna Git You Sucka”. I’m pretty sure that this is how a real Nicki Minaj makeunder would go…
Nicki Minaj has also been sounding off about the rumored plastic surgery that she has undergone and is adamantly denying having ANY plastic surgery…on her face at least. Nicki has collaborated with MAC makeup and is creating a buzz about her new makeup collection with the plastic surgery denial statements. Nicki may not have had plastic surgery above the neck, but she’s certainly not all natural. The rapper’s has had plastic surgery on her body and has had both breast and butt augmentation surgery. Check out the pictures of Nicki before and after plastic surgery here.
Regardless of Nicki’s weak “Elle” makeunder, we can appreciate Nicki’s new toned down look. The 30-year old rapper is actually quite naturally beautiful under all of those layers of makeup. Elle should have featured Nicki without any makeup at all, although it sounds like insecure Nicki would never let that happen.
It’s the same story we’ve all heard a million times: an aging woman gets plastic surgery to appear younger and feel better about herself. Except this time, the woman going under the knife looks 80, but she is actually only 28 years old. Apparently the Chinese woman, whose name is Hu Junhua, suddenly began to age dramatically seven years ago, shortly after giving birth to her son, and appears to be suffering from a mysterious condition that remains undiagnosed. So, since the doctors can’t figure out why she is aging, why not just throw plastic surgery at it, right?
According to Hu Junhua, her abnormally old appearance has had a negative impact on her confidence and has even affected her relationship with family members. “I dare not walk the streets and look into others’ eyes,” she said. “After I acquired the disease, I dare not look at myself in the mirror, and I can’t pick up my child from the school. Even my husband keeps his distance from me.” Well, as plenty of aging and unnaturally-young looking celebrities have proven, plastic surgery can fix all that! Or can it? We understand that rapidly aging to this degree would make anyone in their 20′s self-conscious, but personally I would be a bit more concerned with how this undiagnosed disease is effecting my body internally, and why a plastic surgeon would perform extensive cosmetic surgery on someone that is suffering from an unknown disease. But as usual, vanity trumps all and not only did a plastic surgeon agree to perform the multiple cosmetic procedures on Junhua, he also did it free of charge.
Based on the pictures released to the media, it appears that Junhua underwent a facelift, brow lift, blepharoplasty (eye lift), necklift and a procedure on her ears in January, yet there have been no pictures released of her after the plastic surgery makeover. Now, since there don’t seem to be any “after” pictures of this amazing rapidly aging Chinese woman, nor are there any dated pictures of her seven years ago before she supposedly began the rapid aging process, we’re going on her word here that she’s not simply an 80-year-old woman who is tired of looking 80…
More pictures of 28-year old Hu Junhua:
Time for a little celebrity ketchup! Here are the most noteworthy recent celebrity news stories:
I can’t believe Sean Stewart and Adrienne Maloof broke up! I thought they were totally in it for the long haul! – The Stir
11 bizarre plastic surgery techniques from the past. – Mental Floss
Taylor Swift throws away her fan mail (like every other celebrity) and this is apparently a news worthy story in Nashville. – The Superficial
Of course Lady Gaga’s rollin’ in a pimped out wheel chair. – Too Fab
10 celebrities that starred in pornos before they were famous. – Cracked
Kim Kardashian versus Shamu: Who wore it better? – Style Bistro
I think this woman likes Drake. And has the worst fan tattoo ever… – Pop Star TatsTags: Drake, Jackie Chan, Sean Stewart, Shamu, Tattoos
So it looks like Courtney Stodden has talked someone into buying her some new lips, which she proudly showed off on her Twitter page this week. Was it an early anniversary gift from Doug? Courtney received an 18th birthday present of a nose job and lip injections last year, but apparently she wanted to go even bigger with the lips and is now looking like this:
If Courtney Stodden doesn’t already make your head hurt, try this one on for size…Between getting plastic surgery and composing retarded tweets, Courtney somehow finds time to make ridiculous statements to any media source that will field her calls. Courtney Stodden has recently been comparing herself to Hollywood legends like Marilyn Monroe and Brigitte Bardot and is calling herself iconic. According to Courtney:
“I look back to the pin-up days, to Jayne Mansfield, Brigitte Bardot, Marilyn Monroe and those beautiful, iconic women. So I want to be iconic and I feel like I am [iconic]…Those women were old souls, and I feel like I can connect with them. We’re both old souls and we’re having fun, and being glamorous and flirty”
Since when is banging a dude older than your dad and dressing like a $2 hooker “fun, being glamorous and flirty”?! And how is being an unemployed teenager, spending other people’s money on plastic surgery even noteworthy, let alone “iconic”? At best, Courtney should be comparing herself to Shauna Sand, except that even Shauna Sand had a real live modeling/porn career at one point…AHHHHH *head explodes*
Courtney Stodden versus Shauna Sand:
Adrienne Maloof has been at war with her fellow ‘Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’ co-stars, and they are not holding back! Outspoken Brandi Glanville and normally reserved and polite Lisa Vanderpump have both come out in the media with full blown insults directed at Adrienne Maloof, and more specifically, her plastic surgeried face. Among other things, Brandi has called the quality of Adrienne’s plastic surgery “discounted rate” and after Adrienne insulted Lisa Vanderpump’s restaurant Villa Blanca, Lisa mocked photos circulating of Adrienne before plastic surgery. Only in Hollywood do woman think it’s fair game to insult someone for having plastic surgery, when they too have gone under the plastic surgeons knife!
So just how much plastic surgery has Adrienne Maloof had, and is it really that bad? Adrienne has certainly had her fair share of plastic surgery but it really is nothing more or worse than any of the other housewives. Adrienne is 51-years old and like all of the other Real Housewives, uses her fair share of Botox and injectible fillers. She occasionally gets her lips plumped, but nothing too extreme, and she has breast implants. The two procedures that Adrienne has had, that stand out in a not so good way, are her nose job and what may have been a somewhat recent facelift.
Although Adrienne keeps pictures of herself before she had rhinoplasty surgery hidden away, her nose has obviously been worked on. Judging from the size and shape of it, we would guess that she had her first nose job in the 80′s or early 90′s, when plastic surgeons typically whittled noses down to these little pinched Barbie noses regardless of how such a nose would fit in with the patients other features. When comparing Adrienne’s nose after rhinoplasty to her brother’s noses, it’s quite obvious that she is no longer sporting the Maloof nose that she was born with.
Although getting a bad nose job is not exactly her fault, it is slightly ironic since Adrienne was married to celebrity plastic surgeon Paul Nassif, whos specialty is rhinoplasty surgery. Perhaps that is how they met?!
More recently, it looks like Adrienne has added to her plastic surgery profile and got a facelift too. Her face appears pulled and overly tight and her entire face looks swept upward. Adrienne’s eyes are more slanted and her brows are elevated as well, which are all telltale signs of a facelift.
Judging from the photo comparison of Adrienne Maloof throughout the years, she probably had a facelift in the last 1 – 2 years and we feel that she is at her plastic surgery tipping point. Will she be able to ween herself off of the plastic surgery now that she is no longer married to a plastic surgeon, or will being single and dating in her 50′s lead her down the path of more plastic surgery? Tags: Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
For those of you who were devastated when Fox’s The Swan only lasted two seasons, the plastic surgery reality show is back in production, and this time the ugly ducklings will be celebrities! That’s right, not only is Fox bringing back its cancelled 2004 series, but the network hopes to boost ratings by making the show’s much-awaited return a celebrity special. For those of you who weren’t lucky enough to witness the train wreck that was The Swan, here’s the low-down:
In the original 2004 series, women who were deemed “ugly” were treated to extreme makeovers by a team of cosmetic surgeons, personal trainers, dentists and therapists. Each episode of The Swan featured two women who underwent plastic surgery procedures over the course of three months, and the contestant who ended up being prettier went on to compete in a pageant held at the end of the season. Yep, that’s about as shallow as it gets, folks. Unfortunately for Fox, The Swan aired at a time when networks were still trying to navigate the boundaries of reality television. The revival of the plastic surgery series comes at the perfect time: when all reality TV boundaries have gone out the window.
According to Fox’s official tagline for the show, which will debut as a two-hour special, “Celebrity Swan will feature female celebrities and will offer these popular women the incredible opportunity to undergo physical, psychological and career changes as cameras follow them through the transformative process. This opportunity will allow these women to come back better than ever, have a second change at personal and career redemption and re-introduce themselves to their supportive fans in a whole new way.” Putting the most obvious qualms aside (for now), what exactly does Fox mean by “psychological changes?”
Fox may have been surprised by The Swan‘s drop in ratings after season 2, but really, they should have seen it coming. In the days before plastic surgery reality TV shows like Plastic Wives ruled the airwaves, audiences weren’t all that excited about watching everyday Americans ruin their lives by getting bad plastic surgery. Take U.S. Army captain DeLisa Stiles, for example, who underwent numerous plastic surgery procedures in pursuit of beauty in The Swan 2. Sure she won all the “glory” that comes with being named Fox TV’s “The Swan,” but it cost her her husband of eight years, who filed for divorce while the show was being taped. Add a celebrity element to an even slightly intriguing plastic surgery series though, and you’ve got a captivated audience that doesn’t feel too guilty about staying tuned. After all, judging the appearance of celebrities who undergo plastic surgery happens on a daily basis these days anyway. Why not make it an official competition?
“The Swan” Season 2 contestants before and after:
The original “Housewife”, Vicki Gunvalson, has had a rough couple of years. First she decided to end her 16 year marriage and then she found out that her daughter eloped and got married in Las Vegas! Within the last year Vicki also turned 50 and became a grandmother after her daughter Briana underwent an emergency c-section. So how is Vicki dealing with the stress in her life? With plastic surgery, apparently!
Immediately after getting divorced, Vicki spent $8,000 on a “divorce makeover” and underwent liposuction, Botox, filler injections and laser resurfacing treatments. More recently, Vicki’s face appears to have changed again and her fans want to know what she’s had done now.
Vicki has obviously kept up with the filler and Botox injections and her cheeks are bigger than ever. Vicki also used to have a gummy smile, but it appears that she’s had a procedure to fix it at some point. The most noticeable change though, is her chin! It looks like the most recent plastic surgery this Vicki Gundvalson has undergone is a chin implant and/or a necklift. We’ve received several emails from “Real Housewives of Orange County” fans that insist that Vicki has had a chin implant, but it’s possible that her new look is the result of a necklift, which has defined her chin and jawline.
What do you think of Vicki’s new look? We think she looks great for 50, but we also think she should slow down on the plastic surgery before she over does it!Tags: gummy smile correction, over 50, Real Housewives of Orange County, reality stars